Younger Women…Be Humble and Keep Asking!

Last week I wrote a post to older women as a result of an email I received from a younger leader. You can read that post here. Today I want to address how younger women can be catalysts to bridge the gap to connect with older women.

First of all, you need to understand a couple of things about older women (I’m talking mostly about Boomers and older, although as I said last week we are ALL older and younger than someone). Here are a few myths these women may be believing:

“I do not know all the answers, how can I mentor a younger women?”
“My stories are sacred and just for me.”
“Personal issues are to be kept in the family.”
“I do not want to be prideful by talking about my own life.”
“I’ve not done anything special that younger women need to know about.”
“Younger women don’t need me, they have Google.”
“I am not perfect and my life has certainly NOT been perfect, so what do I have to share?”

Understanding these feelings, will help you overcome these myths to make connections.

And, being honest here, the younger generation has been raised by our culture to believe that you are born leaders and that everything should be instant and easy to acquire. Convenience is a given so if it’s hard it must be bad. We didn’t grow up in that kind of world. Sometimes we do not see how our experiences can help you.

Though you may have been born to lead, you still need training to know how to lead well and lead according to biblical principles. And, the spiritual journey, is not instant…it’s a life long walk that takes us deeper in Christ from salvation to eternity! So, older women can help you see that working long and hard for things is usually beneficial and not a negative.

You can see how different view points and experiences can divide rather than connect women of all ages!

Psalm 102:18 tells us, “This will be written for a later generation, and a newly created people will praise the LORD.” God’s design is to connect all ages of women so that our faith in Him will not fail to be passed to any generation.

SO, here are 9 things to help you bridge the generation gap between you and older women:

Remember that the pace of life was slower for us and though we live in a very fast paced world, perhaps you can slow it down a bit as times to help us make the changes we need to make. Often older we are, the harder it is to make change, so be patient with us.
Ask us questions about our lives. Since many think we don’t have anything you need, you may have to prod us to open up and share stories about work, church, family, success and struggles.
Because many older women are often private about their personal lives, let them know how much a story she shares means to you and to your own journey. I’ve told some of my mentors numerous times how much their pouring into me transparently has changed my life.
Clarify what you want. You know best what you need. Be honest about what you mean by “mentoring” so that her perception doesn’t keep you two from connecting.
Tell us that you want to know simple and practical things. Not everything is Bible study. A woman who doesn’t feel like she can teach the Bible, can share life stories that are grounded in her faith. This may be some of the best practical application of the Bible you can have.
Don’t just say “Will you mentor me”. To her this might mean 2 hours a week, every week, same time, same day. If it becomes that, great! But start out just asking her if she can go to lunch and let you ask her some questions. I’ve had more than one young woman ask me to have lunch to ask questions about ministry. Having served in full time ministry for many years, that was something I was familiar with and loved sharing. But if they’d just asked me to mentor them, I might have run! What blessings I would have missed many times if they hadn’t just “asked me to have lunch”.
Listen humbly. These women really do have wisdom to share if they truly believe you are interested in their stories.
Pray and ask God to lead you to at least one older woman show has “something” you want to know. This can be a practical skill, spiritual lesson, or another life issue. Be alert at church, work, or in your neighborhood for older women to whom you might make a divine connection.
Don’t give up! Keep on asking. Perhaps you’ve tried and not been successful at connecting with a woman or two, but keep on trying.

I want to say that I am sorry if older women have turned you down or just not seen the relevance they could have in your life. We really do want to share, we just sometimes need you to help us learn how to do that well!

What else would you add to this list to help make connections with older women?

Watch next week for more tips on making generational connections!

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

Banner Photo by Mārtiņš Zemlickis on Unsplash